MEN AND SHOPPING
I trudged around Tesco in Hexham this afternoon, Katy in the Trolley Ian skulking like a wannabe teenager as far away as possible, speaking only to ask for electronic games of mass murder, oh the joys!
Always a people watcher (it does save me from parenting) I have started to notice huge differences in the way men and women shop. It’s a Sunday afternoon; Tesco’s is a pretty even mix of dads with access, young families, hung over singles and Sunday drivers over sixty.
I followed a George Clooney with a beer belly for a couple of aisles, he had a list, he did not deviate, didn’t browse didn’t go near the reduced aisle, didn’t make small talk, didn’t back track for anything.
I stopped following him as I just couldn’t keep up, an aisle further on and I watched a young couple on the alcohol aisle, he had a pack of Stella in the trolley then at her nag out the trolley, then back in the trolley, you get the idea. Shopping together can obviously be a real strain. Embarrassed I did a 5 point turn (my trolley should be fitted with L plates) and left them to it.
Musing on the differences between the sexes and refusing Red Bull as a packed lunch staple, I progressed to the frozen foods section, stopped in my pursuit of fish fingers by three women barricading their trolleys whilst discussing the virtues of buy one get one free or if they were better with the value brand. Men just wouldn’t do this, they value their time more, and they aren’t social animals, they also don’t enjoy shopping their main focus is get in, get what they want and get out.
Men shop like they date; they are in fact far more straight forward than women. In acknowledging the differences between the two sexes and borrowing the good bits from both I think we can learn to date more effectively. I am in awe of the way men can be so driven can focus on their search criteria, are decisive and to a degree selfish. The problems come with the blinkers, when men are so sure of what they think they want they may be missing out on something different which could be better. The women that discuss their shopping choices are the same women who discuss new relationships getting hints, tips and advice from their friends.
Women are undoubtedly more social beings, better at being proactive, I see this on a daily basis, I have more enquiries from women and women are quicker to give me feedback after their dates making it easier for me to match make for them. When I have arranged social events women are more likely to turn up, to try something new, men are happier in their comfort zone.
Unfortunately men who are happily going to the same pub with their mates, same curry house afterwards, and same football team the following weekend..... These men are going to meet the same women or in fact no women.
I love my job; matchmaking allows me to have a birds eye view of dating. I meet the men and women personally and have a feel for their characters, I know their likes and dislikes and have a sense of who they are and what they are looking for.
Often without matchmaking these men and women just wouldn’t meet. I had an email waiting for me on my return home, being discreet I will call her X , she has been matched for 8 weeks and is so happy, she can’t believe they live less than a mile from each other and would like to suspend her membership as she is so pleased with the way the relationship is going. They are both in their mid thirties with similar interests and hobbies, yet without joining Elegant Introductions chances are they would never have met.
Matchmaking is not rocket science , it’s about listening and emphasising , supporting my members and bridging the gap between the sexes.