CONVERSATION FOR STARTERS

 

 

First date conversation is like a meal and with Elegant I send you the menu before you meet one another. You will each have been sent each other’s profiles which I was flippantly referring to as conversation Menu’s.

This Menu’s tell you your dates likes, dislikes, hobbies, interests, job and ambitions. I’m not saying you should adopt stalker like tendencies and approach like Katherine Heigll' s character in “The Ugly Truth” with the profile clutched in your hand...... What I am suggesting is that you take the time to read about your date, see why I have matched you both, familiarise yourself with what you have in common and also quickly check those things your partner dislikes, for example avoid spending 5 mins talking about your Doberman If she dislikes pets.

For your starter the chef would suggest a simple compliment everyone likes to be complimented on their appearance it is a natural ice breaker and sincere flattery is always appreciated. Some people feel uncomfortable receiving compliments so to avoid any awkwardness follow with something inoffensive such as a comment on the venue, followed with a question to lead the conversation.

“What a lovely restaurant, have you been here before?”

Once you have discussed the venue and probably other eateries you have enjoyed the ice should be broken and you will be in the beginnings of a conversation, If you are not conversing freely think back to your partners profile a compliment followed by a reference to their profile would show you had been interested enough to remember ending with a question nicely puts the conversation menu back into their hands

“You are in fabulous shape, I noticed you enjoyed ski-ing, will you be going later in the year?”

Everyone when they are nervous will revert to talking about themselves it is after all the subject you know most about. By being conscious of this you can frame questions to lead the conversation back to your partner. This is a balancing act as you must avoid your date turning into an interview but it must not be a monologue either. This bit of the date always reminds me of Lady and The Tramp, that iconic moment where they share the spaghetti and meatballs and end up kissing on the last bit of spaghetti. The aim of good first date conversation is that you are enjoying sharing your meal so much that you don’t notice you are on the last morsel until you are sharing it.


Date is nearly over you have broken the ice enjoyed a starter and main, now for afters, the most delicious sweetest part. You now need a closing conversation ideally one that clears the way toward another date or lets the other person down gently. I often have clients phone me days after a date as they don’t know how it went, who was meant to call , when they were going to call, did they like each other enough for another date?

I always end the date with a thank you; you should thank the person for their company regardless of whether there was any chemistry. You should also give an indication on if and when you will call to arrange another date.